1. The voice system
2. The Blackberry guy, because the voice system cannot parse "sidekick"
3. The woman who told me to turn off my phone and pull the battery, but was eventually persuaded to give me tech support instead
4. The Sidekick woman, who was really helpful and said that yes, the email had come back and then gone down again, the estimate was 12-24 hours till it's back and running, yes, the idea is to offer free minutes first, but customer service could do a $5 credit instead, and that the Sidekick department was also called "Danger" something-or-other -- I bet it'll parse the "D" better than the siblant.
5. The Customer Service woman who said that she'd gotten the information from the Sidekick woman and that I'd get the credit on my next bill, and to keep checking to see if email was getting through.
Let's hope this all resolves nicely.